Invitations, an overview.
I know, I know, I know...I owe you the second part of Bridal Bliss to Budget Bust, however, something caught my eye today and I wanted to share it with you immediately because sometimes in the hurricane of life, thoughts go as quickly as they come. This particular thought, I believe, can give a lot of people heaps of helpful information. That being said...I will finish the second budgeting post in the coming days. Stay tuned!
In the link attached to this post, Martha Stewart's impeccable team of wedding experts have put together a wonderful cache of information on invitations. It describes many of the things that make wedding invitations so beautiful, so breathtaking, and so very unique: paper weight and type, color, style, finish, printing methods, typeface, embellishments, etc.
This article got the memory portion of my brain stirring about the questions asked most often when it comes to brides and grooms addressing their guests' invitations. Well, it also brought up how to word the actual invites, then all of the possible inserts, but that would be much more than just one post, so I decided to stick to the one facet that has so many rules: Addressing.
So, just how do you do it? Please accept this offering of tips and "hard and fast" (or soft and blurry) rules to help you through the arduous task of addressing your own wedding invitations:
First, I beg of you, remember that abbreviations should not be used in either the body of invitations or in addressing the envelopes.
My golden rule: When in doubt, spell it out!
If a street number is less than 100, it should also be spelled out. Also, you should be writing out words such as "Street" and "Boulevard". The only exception to the abbreviation rule is "Mr." it can, and most often is, abbreviated. (Don't look at me, I didn't write the rule. I'm just trying to clarify it.) Names are a monster all their own, and we'll slay that dragon in a few short paragraphs.
After years of reviewing resources, I've found that the postal service has a preference regarding state names, and sometimes that preference changes. Most often, they ask that people write out the city name and then use the two letter state abbreviation without a comma between the two. However, I love seeing magnificent script, penning both city and state names...but in this instance I would separate these with a comma. Either option is perfectly acceptable. However, I strongly recommend asking your local post master which addressing option is going to be more accurate in delivery. This cuts down on a slew of returned invitations.
When adding a return address to the envelopes, the postal service requests that return address be printed (meaning, legibly written...whether it is done in your own hand writing, letter pressed, or by a professional calligrapher) in the upper left hand corner of the envelopes, and not put on the envelope's flap. This also helps insure that your guests will be able to clearly interpret the return address in the event that they need to change their RSVP status, send a gift or other written communication. It is also acceptable to emboss your return address on the envelope's flap. That being said, the United States Postal Service does not regularly recognize embossing.
In the event that an invite has been returned due to lack of postage, incorrect postage or illegible address (and believe me, it happens more often than anyone would like to admit), the old envelope should be discarded and a new one addressed in its place. I recommend that you order a few extra invites and additional outer envelopes, and set aside a few fully assembled invitations in the event that you should have some returns or additional unexpected invites. This helps to cut down stress. And we all know, it is all in cutting out the stress that makes for an enjoyable planning process. That, my friends, is what I'm all about.
I think that covers the postal part of this, but remember that dragon (the names)? It's beginning to breathe fire out if its cave...
How do you address your guests?
Well, that becomes a little tricky. I highly suggest having an outer and inner envelope, this can help immensely in distinguishing who is actually invited, and not just mere intention.
For families and family members:
Never, ever use the words "and family" on your wedding invitation envelopes.
How then, do you invite family members? Well, the rules are a little fuzzy here...some sources say that children over the age of 13 should get their own invites, some say 16, others say 18. I say, do what you are most comfortable with and what your budget allows for. If you have lots of young cousins, you may want to rethink the age limit of 13!
The parents and adults, of course, get the first line...Mr. and Mrs. Albert Snow (you can also write out Mister and Missus, and if you are considering this, I suggest you speak to a calligrapher or review more resources as to the best options for this). On the inner envelopes, feel free to write Grandma, Uncle Mike, or Aunt June. The inner envelopes are for informal terms and additional invites not listed on the outer envelope.
If the parents have small children, the names of the parents are on the outer envelope and the small children can then be written on the inner envelope. Now, if the children are older (and again, use your judgement on this one...I think it should be done about the age of 8 or 10), their names should get a line below their parents. If you are not inviting young children, as many choose to do, then leaving the names off of the inner envelope is the indicator. Siblings over the age of 18, living together in a residence outside their parents' home should be refereed to as Misses Ann and Mary Smith (for sisters) or Messrs. Joe and Jack Smith (for brothers), and if they are brother and sister, Mr. and Miss is appropriate. Confused yet? Wait, it gets worse. But, you will have the answers when you need them, I promise.
For your single friends:
You have a dear friend, and you want that friend to be able to bring a guest...the outer envelope would say Miss Jones, while the inner envelope would say, for example, Miss Jones and Guest. That way Miss Jones knows she is invited to bring along a date. Now, if you are limited on space, and are not able to let Miss Jones invite an extra guest, the inner envelope should just say, Miss Jones.
The last piece of information I want to include is a small chronicle to help guide you along the remaining path to appropriate addressing, and here it is:
For multiple boys under 12 years (second address line): The Masters Snow
For multiple girls under 12 years (second address line): The Misses Snow
For one girl, over or under 12 years: Miss Snow
For one boy, over 12 years: Mr. Alex Snow
Unmarried woman: Miss
Unmarried man: Mr.
Married couple: Mr. and Mrs. Smith
Husband as Ph.D., M.D. or D.D.S: Doctor and Mrs. Smith
Wife as Ph.D., M.D. or D.D.S: Doctor Ann Smith and Mr. Smith
Both are Ph.D., M.D. or D.D.S (with same last name): The Doctors Smith
Professor or Dean: Professor or Dean
Attorney: John Smith, Esq.
Office/Government/Judge, etc: The Honorable
Rabbi: Rabbi Jones
Catholic Priest: Reverend or Father (use Father on inner envelope)
Minister: Reverend
Military Office if Commissioned: Colonel and Mrs. Smith Second line:United States Navy
Widow: Mrs. Albert Smith
Divorced: Mrs. Ann Smith
Married with wife keeping maiden name: Ms. Ann Burns Second line: Mr. John Smith
Engaged couple or unmarried but living together: Miss Ann Burns Second line: Mr John Smith
Well folks, I think that about covers the mélange of possibilities of your guest combinations. I always look forward to the ones who will read all the way through this and give me more options. I am always looking for an opportunity to learn and grow. For now though, I hope that I have helped shed some insight into the mixed up, rule-laden land of invitation addressing.
In the link attached to this post, Martha Stewart's impeccable team of wedding experts have put together a wonderful cache of information on invitations. It describes many of the things that make wedding invitations so beautiful, so breathtaking, and so very unique: paper weight and type, color, style, finish, printing methods, typeface, embellishments, etc.
This article got the memory portion of my brain stirring about the questions asked most often when it comes to brides and grooms addressing their guests' invitations. Well, it also brought up how to word the actual invites, then all of the possible inserts, but that would be much more than just one post, so I decided to stick to the one facet that has so many rules: Addressing.
So, just how do you do it? Please accept this offering of tips and "hard and fast" (or soft and blurry) rules to help you through the arduous task of addressing your own wedding invitations:
First, I beg of you, remember that abbreviations should not be used in either the body of invitations or in addressing the envelopes.
My golden rule: When in doubt, spell it out!
If a street number is less than 100, it should also be spelled out. Also, you should be writing out words such as "Street" and "Boulevard". The only exception to the abbreviation rule is "Mr." it can, and most often is, abbreviated. (Don't look at me, I didn't write the rule. I'm just trying to clarify it.) Names are a monster all their own, and we'll slay that dragon in a few short paragraphs.
After years of reviewing resources, I've found that the postal service has a preference regarding state names, and sometimes that preference changes. Most often, they ask that people write out the city name and then use the two letter state abbreviation without a comma between the two. However, I love seeing magnificent script, penning both city and state names...but in this instance I would separate these with a comma. Either option is perfectly acceptable. However, I strongly recommend asking your local post master which addressing option is going to be more accurate in delivery. This cuts down on a slew of returned invitations.
When adding a return address to the envelopes, the postal service requests that return address be printed (meaning, legibly written...whether it is done in your own hand writing, letter pressed, or by a professional calligrapher) in the upper left hand corner of the envelopes, and not put on the envelope's flap. This also helps insure that your guests will be able to clearly interpret the return address in the event that they need to change their RSVP status, send a gift or other written communication. It is also acceptable to emboss your return address on the envelope's flap. That being said, the United States Postal Service does not regularly recognize embossing.
In the event that an invite has been returned due to lack of postage, incorrect postage or illegible address (and believe me, it happens more often than anyone would like to admit), the old envelope should be discarded and a new one addressed in its place. I recommend that you order a few extra invites and additional outer envelopes, and set aside a few fully assembled invitations in the event that you should have some returns or additional unexpected invites. This helps to cut down stress. And we all know, it is all in cutting out the stress that makes for an enjoyable planning process. That, my friends, is what I'm all about.
I think that covers the postal part of this, but remember that dragon (the names)? It's beginning to breathe fire out if its cave...
How do you address your guests?
Well, that becomes a little tricky. I highly suggest having an outer and inner envelope, this can help immensely in distinguishing who is actually invited, and not just mere intention.
For families and family members:
Never, ever use the words "and family" on your wedding invitation envelopes.
How then, do you invite family members? Well, the rules are a little fuzzy here...some sources say that children over the age of 13 should get their own invites, some say 16, others say 18. I say, do what you are most comfortable with and what your budget allows for. If you have lots of young cousins, you may want to rethink the age limit of 13!
The parents and adults, of course, get the first line...Mr. and Mrs. Albert Snow (you can also write out Mister and Missus, and if you are considering this, I suggest you speak to a calligrapher or review more resources as to the best options for this). On the inner envelopes, feel free to write Grandma, Uncle Mike, or Aunt June. The inner envelopes are for informal terms and additional invites not listed on the outer envelope.
If the parents have small children, the names of the parents are on the outer envelope and the small children can then be written on the inner envelope. Now, if the children are older (and again, use your judgement on this one...I think it should be done about the age of 8 or 10), their names should get a line below their parents. If you are not inviting young children, as many choose to do, then leaving the names off of the inner envelope is the indicator. Siblings over the age of 18, living together in a residence outside their parents' home should be refereed to as Misses Ann and Mary Smith (for sisters) or Messrs. Joe and Jack Smith (for brothers), and if they are brother and sister, Mr. and Miss is appropriate. Confused yet? Wait, it gets worse. But, you will have the answers when you need them, I promise.
For your single friends:
You have a dear friend, and you want that friend to be able to bring a guest...the outer envelope would say Miss Jones, while the inner envelope would say, for example, Miss Jones and Guest. That way Miss Jones knows she is invited to bring along a date. Now, if you are limited on space, and are not able to let Miss Jones invite an extra guest, the inner envelope should just say, Miss Jones.
The last piece of information I want to include is a small chronicle to help guide you along the remaining path to appropriate addressing, and here it is:
For multiple boys under 12 years (second address line): The Masters Snow
For multiple girls under 12 years (second address line): The Misses Snow
For one girl, over or under 12 years: Miss Snow
For one boy, over 12 years: Mr. Alex Snow
Unmarried woman: Miss
Unmarried man: Mr.
Married couple: Mr. and Mrs. Smith
Husband as Ph.D., M.D. or D.D.S: Doctor and Mrs. Smith
Wife as Ph.D., M.D. or D.D.S: Doctor Ann Smith and Mr. Smith
Both are Ph.D., M.D. or D.D.S (with same last name): The Doctors Smith
Professor or Dean: Professor or Dean
Attorney: John Smith, Esq.
Office/Government/Judge, etc: The Honorable
Rabbi: Rabbi Jones
Catholic Priest: Reverend or Father (use Father on inner envelope)
Minister: Reverend
Military Office if Commissioned: Colonel and Mrs. Smith Second line:United States Navy
Widow: Mrs. Albert Smith
Divorced: Mrs. Ann Smith
Married with wife keeping maiden name: Ms. Ann Burns Second line: Mr. John Smith
Engaged couple or unmarried but living together: Miss Ann Burns Second line: Mr John Smith
Well folks, I think that about covers the mélange of possibilities of your guest combinations. I always look forward to the ones who will read all the way through this and give me more options. I am always looking for an opportunity to learn and grow. For now though, I hope that I have helped shed some insight into the mixed up, rule-laden land of invitation addressing.
Labels: Brides wedding planning coordinating invitations and addressing invitations
posted by Brynn | 2:36 PM
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